How NOT to look hot

While so many non-Muslim women in the west are trying their best to look hot to the outside world, we Muslim women try not to look hot. Well, part of us. I hate it when non-Muslims ask me why some hijabi girls look so… ‘’conspicuous’’. I hate it because I can sense the incredibility of hijab in their words. But you know what? I think 99% of those hijabis don’t have bad intentions. Any woman with the slightest bit of femininity in her soul has the inner need to look pretty and presentable. The pitfall here is that we don’t always know where to cross a line between looking well-groomed and looking sexy. So… what is sexy?

You’re probably thinking: women. Ok, I’ll give you that, but I want to talk about some ‘normal’ things women do unintentionally that attract men. Men don’t look at the female body the same way we do, so we need to stop projecting our own views onto men and instead try to understand the male perspective.

Wait, why does she think she knows what attracts men?

Hold on, don’t judge me yet. I’m neither a femme fatale nor a secret lesbian. Some things I have learned through trial and mistake, but for the most part I try to make the world around me, with its seductresses and shameless men, my teacher. By no means do I call myself an expert, but I have eyes and brains that notice patterns and so I want to share with you some easy-to-make mistakes.

5 things that attract men

  1. Visible shape

When we hear ‘sexy’ we usually think of cleavage and miniskirts, but tight clothes seem to have the same effect on men.  It’s about seeing the shape of the female body. The waist is a key point here. By accentuating the waist you automatically accentuate the curves above and below the waist. A short but loose dress will not have the same impact as a bodycon dress or skinny jeans with a tight top, even though the loose dress shows more skin.

If you want to sabotage men’s imagination, think about covering your shape (and your skin of course). I think a good rule of thumb would be to make sure people can’t tell your exact underwear sizes. I’m not kidding.

  1. High heels

Again something we know, but don’t realize enough yet. High heels have a strong sexual impact on men, but it’s not because they make a woman look taller. By standing on her toes her legs look better, her back arches and her butt and chest stick out more. High heels change her posture into a sexual pose. They’re powerful things.

  1. Long necklaces, closed boleros, eye-catching bodices, etc.

You didn’t see that first one coming, did you? Long necklaces put emphasis on the breasts. Men don’t realize it either, but they react to it. Tight, closed boleros and eye-catching bodices (especially sweetheart necklines and visible cups) seem more obvious to me but I’m not sure if that many people are aware of how much emphasis they put on the breasts. Again, don’t make it easy for people to guess your bra size.

  1. Perfume

There is a difference between perfume and soap. Not only are they not interchangeable when it comes to getting rid of body odor; they have a different impact on your surroundings too. It’s ok to smell nice and clean, but those spritzes of seductive eau de parfum are best in the privacy of your home.

  1. Bold makeup

Men always say they don’t like makeup, but I think it’s only normal not to believe people who yell X and then say Y is hot. Who attracts more men: the girl with light/no makeup, or the girl with full face va va voom makeup? The question is self-explanatory. Va va voom of course! I think guys just hate bad makeup and that they’re afraid of being tricked by good makeup. When they see an attractive woman with heavy eye makeup they don’t seem to care about makeup anymore; they just think she’s hot. But when they see her bare faced they don’t find her hot anymore… hmm why would that be? Oh yeah, makeup.

I personally think a bit of makeup can help a woman look well groomed, but anything too obvious will make her draw a lot of attention. Bold lips, smokey eyes, Kim K contouring… better keep the goodies in your drawer instead of on your face when you go out 😉


”Ok, so how can I look presentable without looking overly attractive?”

Fair question. I will answer this next time. Stay tuned!

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