The girl that doesn’t wear hijab

Incredible. It’s just incredible how stupid some people sound when they talk about girls that don’t wear hijab. To some people a headscarf is all there is and all that matters. This often comes from the type of men that really try to hide their sins behind their beard. Guess what? You can’t fake noor. Neither will applying Nars Albatross all over a hijabi’s face give her noor. The radiance of a religious person is unique and special, something skin-deep. Noor comes from a religious heart and a religious heart does not know pride. So why do so many people speak so badly about other sinners?

People come with the most awful assumptions on why a girl doesn’t wear hijab. They often assume terrible things about her. While I can understand why people assume certain things about them, I don’t think it’s safe to assume anything at all. Instead of helping the girl they ridicule her and the worst thing about that is that they don’t notice their pride when they do so.

Here are some – often ridiculous – prejudices I’ve heard about hijabless girls:

  • She doesn’t wear it because she thinks it is oppressive and doesn’t fit a liberal mindset.
  • She denies that Islam obliges it.
  • She doesn’t wear it because she wants to turn men on sexually.
  • She doesn’t wear it because she’s com-ple-te-ly messed up, way off the right track. She’s absolutely not marriage material.
  • She wants to wear it, but she isn’t ready to let go of certain big sins and so she thinks it would be hypocritical to wear hijab.
  • She doesn’t pray.
  • She is religiously inferior; she’s a bad Muslim altogether. She has practically no personal relationship with Allah. She worships Him less and has more sins on her scale.
  • She’s kafira, because you can’t be Muslim and not wear hijab.
  • She automatically has zero knowledge of Islam.
  • She has (intimate) relationships.
  • Her way of dressing must be the other extreme of modesty; she must dress as a window prostitute. Because there is nothing in the middle, obviously.
  • She wears prominent makeup and plucks her eyebrows.

Bottom line: there is no way that she doesn’t party, commit zina and such. And there is surely no possibility that she prays fajr on time!

It doesn’t cross their mind that her outer hijab may be her biggest weakness. Maybe she’s dying to wear it, but she’s just scared and insecure. Maybe she’s very sad about it and cries for guidance and forgiveness. Maybe she is fighting a battle that was easy for you, and I am sure you are fighting of have fought a battle that was easy for her. You don’t know the story, so be careful with your thoughts.

My point is only: don’t be quick to judge. Everybody has different spiritual paths and different struggles. Don’t ever assume you are better than another. You don’t know what connection she has with the Lord and you don’t know what good things she might do in secret. She may as well have a bunch of orphans on her side or something else that raises her status to Allah. It could be that this girl has one visible weakness, while you may have many secret weaknesses. Don’t be arrogant and try not to be judgmental, because when you point your finger at another you will always have three fingers pointing back at you. Remember that.

4 thoughts on “The girl that doesn’t wear hijab

  1. Is it that mean ?
    don’t judge people whatever they do front of all for example eat ham or drink wine … So on !!

    • What I mean is focus on your own mistakes and improving yourself instead of other people’s mistakes. The pitfall of looking at someone’s mistakes is that you may falsely assume other things and that you are better than them in other aspects too. You can help others by giving tactful(!) advice though.

  2. Most of muslims fall into an-naar because of our own tongue.

    The best response is, approach if possible, talk with her, be her best friend while you’re showing her by your manners not to dictating or pointing your thought. Islam means salam for each other. Not a threat.

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